Who’s A Lucky Girl Then?

I am 🙂

After a week of feeling upset, sad and, frankly, ready to quit Purehealth for good, I have discovered how really, truly lucky I am.

One: I have a strong core that is not easily shaken by life now. This is very much in contrast to how I used to be. When I was in my early twenties, I was as strong and confident as an Ox – until I had a bullying boss who ground me down and staff problems in the shops and offices I was running for Holland & Barrett. My resilience took a bad hit but it eventually came back up, although never to full strength again.

This last week, I had another work knock-back and I found the way I thought about it was entirely different. Suffice to say, my resilience is back to my early twenties’ levels and probably even stronger. The work I’ve done with meditation, neuroplasticity and, not least, the treatments with Julie, have clearly not only put me in a really good healing state, it has made me much stronger at my ‘core’. If you have a strong core, (a bit like Pilates!), not much is going to make you fall down!

I suppose if this latest ‘challenge’ hadn’t happened, I would not have known my own strength, so I accept the issue as a Universal message I was meant to get and am thankful for it. Now. It did take a few days 😉

This actually ties in with a post that popped into my Inbox this morning from Rick Hanson. I’m sure he won’t mind me copying it here for you – it’s on his newsletters which you can subscribe to here. In fact, I will be talking again about him funnily enough in a day or so because I’m adding his programme onto the Stress Factsheet, so more of that anon..

What can you do when you’re shaken?

I’ve been to New Zealand, and really respect and like it. There’s a Maori term – turangawaewae, “a place to stand” – that I’ve come back to many times. 
I’m sure I don’t know the full meaning of the word in its cultural context. But at a basic level, it’s clear that we all need a place to stand. A physical place to be sure – hearth and home, land and sea, a bed to curl up in – but also psychological or spiritual places, such as feeling loved, a calm clear center inside, knowledge of the facts, compassion and ethics, and realistic plans.  
This is our ground, the place we rest in and move out from . . . even under the best of circumstances. And when you’re shaken by events at any scale – from changes in your health to changes in your country or world (here’s a recent post you may find relevant: Take Heart) – then it’s especially important to find and hold your ground.

Start with the body, and the feeling of being here. The sensations of breathing . . . heart beating . . . going on living . . . feet on the floor, back against a chair. Whatever is true now can never be taken from you.  
Then, silly as it may seem, it can help to reassure yourself about the immediate survival and welfare of yourself and those you care about. Check in with your kids, your friends. Separate thoughts and fears about the future from the reality of the present. Remind yourself that at least in this moment you and they are still basically OK (of course, only if this is genuinely true).
Know that you stand in a web of relationships even if it’s tattered in some ways. Others do care about you. There is camaraderie with people who are also shaken. 
Establish as best you can the relevant facts. What is currently true? What caused it – particularly the causes that will continue? What is likely to happen in the future? But watch out for obsessing, blaming, or catastrophizing. When things are shaky, it’s easy to get revved up in thoughts and analyses, let alone imagined arguments with people on Facebook or TV (speaking from personal experience).  
Sort out the impacts of events on you, and on others. Be concrete and realistic about consequences for yourself; don’t under- or over-estimate them. Also recognize any sense of injustice, moral outrage, compassion, or concern about how others will or could be harmed. This is often the most upsetting aspect of a situation, and naming it to yourself is clarifying and grounding, and sets you up to do something about it. 
Not an easy thing, but in a way the art is opening your heart to the likely suffering of others while closing your head to those who are trying to get into it to rattle, frighten, infuriate, or confuse you.  
Start figuring out what you are going to do in three areas: 
* Personal practice – Stand in what feeds you. Like petting your cat, making soup, meditating, loving others, or giving thanks. Guard your attention; disengage from news, websites, or interactions that add little value and mainly just upset you. 
* Protecting your own interests – Focus on what’s in your control. If these apply: take a fresh look at your health, insurance, finances, loose ends, and plans for an emergency. Make a list and work through it. Personally, I find that action eases anxiety.  
* For the sake of others – Without falling into righteousness, I think it’s important to be confident about what you know is true and about your values. Why is it that the people who are most ignorant of the facts and most casual about how they’re harming others are often the ones who look most assured, whether it’s across a dining table or on TV? Claim and stand your ground with moral confidence. Not wasting time in dead-end arguments or “feeding the trolls,” but identifying actions that will make a difference – at whatever scale is accessible to you – and then doing them. 
Last, know you are not alone. Whatever you are dealing with, from a personal health problem to a worry about a child to a deep concern about global events, other people right now are also dealing with it or something similar. We stand together on common ground.

And that brings me onto number two of how  lucky I am:

Two: I have a community of friends and ‘family’ in Purehealth who bring me even more strength and have my back. This week, they have demonstrated it wonderfully to me.

Christine (Facebook & TGF Supplement woman) and I have been noticing that the groups were quieter than normal for the past few months. So, I asked if people wanted us to keep the groups going or were they getting their support and answers from elsewhere -which I truly don’t mind, but I didn’t want to keep the groups going if they weren’t needed or being used anymore.

Had we had our day, I wondered, should I start shutting up the groups and think about winding Purehealth up after more than 25 years if I am no longer needed? Had I done my stint? Had others surpassed what I could give maybe?

I wasn’t prepared for the answers, and they actually made me cry. I’ll share a few here for you; again I’m sure they won’t mind:

“Please don’t close Purehealth. You offer us all so much and it would be devastating if Purehealth didn’t exist any more. Whoever or whatever upset you is getting a virtual punch in the face lol!! 
“You gave my daughter her life back Micki. She’s gone from not able to get out of bed to 4 A levels and a little job as a waitress!!! I tell everyone about you. If you ever feel like that again – send me a message!!!! You are an incredible person who changes lives xxxxx
“Ooh no, please don’t close this group!! You all feel like family and the info, help and support it provides is invaluable.

“Noooooooooo – we need you!

“I’m sorry your thinking about closing Purehealth and I hope it doesn’t become a reality as you have considerably helped me in getting my life back on track and turning a major corner and I am sure I am not the only one who would be deeply affected by it’s departure.
“Your work on PureHealth is such a great resource for so many people – it has so much helpful information, all on one website. It’s brilliant… I hope you know how much appreciation there is out there for you and your work – maybe we haven’t shouted it loud enough – so . . .

“Oh, Micki, it would be such a loss if you were to close Purehealth completely. Practitioners like you (open-minded, caring, knowledgable, willing to take a risk and explore new avenues of healing) are so rare and hard time to find these days. And this group is such an important meeting place for those of us struggling with chronic and autoimmune disease. I have several groups that i belong too and learn from, but this is my most important one. .

“This is a lovely community and tremendously helpful to each other. Which is all thanks to Micki and her knowledge, publications and caring, compassionate practice.

“..please keep the group open. So fantastic info that I would struggle to find anywhere else and lots of great support

“No way baby! This is my secret group of Truly smart people! (TSP) That’s why you keep it small, there are so few of us, right Micki?

Gulp. That was just a few of them. That told me!!

I think I had better carry on then. Onward – and with renewed vigour, strength and determination to make it better than ever.

Thank you all so much. I am truly a lucky girl 🙂

2 Replies to “Who’s A Lucky Girl Then?”

  1. My word! So sorry about the ‘ upset’ . You help so many people, you have a wonderful gift , ‘onwards and Upwards’ Excelsior !!!

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